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yes brain, you can has

April 2015

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The Blogger's Prayer

Lo, there do I see my posts.
Lo, there do I see my tweets.
Lo, there do I see my gifsets and my picspams.
Lo, there do I see the line of my blog, back to the beginning.
Lo, they do call to me.
They bid me take my place among them on the Internets,
Where the geek may live forever.

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astro_noms: (now panic and freak out)
So the university (or rather our department) is doing its damnedest to fuck us over by introducing a proposal to change the date we have to submit the final versions of our MA theses - from two weeks before the defense to TEN WEEKS. Which means that we might have to have them ready by just after Easter, or else have to defend in the fall. Apparently everyone at the department board meeting was against it, and the dean was the one who pushed for it, they're going to have him "think it over" and issue a final ruling that nobody will be able to appeal. And to make matters worse, nobody from the student council was at the meeting, which they're supposed to attend so they can, you know, look out for our interests.

Which is, of course, bullshit. And it not only affects us but also our thesis supervisors, who have to put together the exam commissions and find reviewers and everything else that much earlier. But, you know, who cares about that? There's some office monkey somewhere higher up in the hierarchy, possibly in the ministry of education, who incidentally has no idea what the fuck they're doing, who decided to show off by submitting a proposal like this, and now everyone's running with it. Without a moment's thought for the students. And now nobody knows what's happening, and everyone's in a panic, and don't even try to figure out how to plan the next six months of your life because fuck you, that's why.

I'm personally leaning towards deferring my defense till the fall anyway, because that'll give me a little more time to finish my thesis without having to, as our supervisor told us to do, cutting whatever's not needed and just getting it done. I may hate this university, I may hate my institute, I may hate my advisor, and I may hate the useless, unimaginative, lifeless husk that I call my thesis, but goddammit, I've made it this far, and I'd like for this thing to actually be something more than throwing up half-digested bits of other people's research and calling it a thesis. *siiiiigh*

We found all of this out on Tuesday, and I've been so fucking pissed off since then, I can't think straight. I have an essay to write for tomorrow, plus a cover letter and a resume to put together (also for tomorrow) so I can apply for the internship program they're offering this year. If I get into the program, it's 120 hours over two months, with the possibility of being offered a job with the company we intern with. Which means that I'll have less time to work on my thesis, which means I probably won't make the deadline, whether they move it or not. But the thing is, the internship is going to be a lot more useful to me in my professional life than a degree nobody cares about me having. So that's pretty much my decision made for me.
astro_noms: (dinosaurs can love too)
The design job fell apart yesterday (tl;dr - the clients turned out to be unprofessional dickbags who didn't return phone calls, didn't follow through on what they said they would do, and to top it all off, expected the two of us to do the work for less than the monthly wage of a grocery store cashier, so we told them to go fuck themselves), and the aftermath is hitting me today. It's the middle of July, and I've spent the last month holding off on finding another job with the hope that this would take care of the summer job situation. As it is, my mother's coming to Poland in a couple of weeks, so I'm probably going to be expected to be at my grandparents' for the duration of her stay, and with no job to fall back on, I don't even have an excuse of needing to be home rather than there. (My family don't know about the job falling apart, so maybe I can keep it that way? IDK.)

I haven't been able to write, not fanfic, not original stuff, not my MA thesis, not my blogs. I feel hollow and burned out, and nothing I do is helping. I've been trying to catch up on my reading list a bit, but my attention span keeps wandering and I get distracted/bored and wander off to... do nothing. Catching up on TV shows isn't really working because of the same attention span issues. And it's too hot/humid/muggy outside to go and do summer stuff outside. So mostly, it's been a month of just... existing, and hoping summer will end sooner than later.

This is where you guys come in! I'm going to push through this ennui thing and make myself do something creative. I'll take five prompts for a fanmix (since that's what seems to be the most realistic right now), between 10-15 songs. Can be fandom/fic/book/movie/whatever-specific, can be just a theme, whatever. I'd go back to the list of prompts for the fanmix project, but revisiting a failure from two years ago hardly seems like the thing to do when trying to move ahead.

1. Non-English songs ([personal profile] sylvaine)
2. Steve/Bucky reunion ([personal profile] musesfool)
3. Songs To Kill Monsters By ([personal profile] wiredwizard)
4. Songs to Watch Thunderstorms With ([personal profile] crescent_gaia)
5. Cannibalism ([personal profile] scarimonious)
astro_noms: (fuck you because unicorn)

The best thing to happen this year.

When I first planned to do this challenge, I was still in the throes of the "omg, I'm going to grad school!" high from the beginning of the summer. And then time passed, and I came face to face with the bureaucratic fuckery that is the higher education system, and a lot of the shine has worn off. So I'm gonna go with finishing my B.A., and getting to go on a road trip through Europe with my mom. :)

Mirrored from Tangents and Digressions.

astro_noms: (fuck you because unicorn)
They've announced that "due to administrative issues" they're not going to extend the number of spots in the translation seminar, so those of us who didn't manage to sign up are SOL and have to sign up for other ones. I managed to snag a spot in the "Friendship in 19th Century British Literature" group, which is... well, sucky beyond belief. But in the interests of keeping my sanity and actually being able to function and attend classes, I'm going to try and make the best of it. I need to go to the dean's office tomorrow to find out how it works when you have someone else as your advisor (because it's possible to do that), whether you have to basically do double the work—both the seminar stuff in something you're not interested in, and the research for the thesis, or whether your advisor grades your work and the other instructor just inputs it, or what.

If it's possible not to do double the work, I'll have to do some more work over the weekend and write an actual thesis proposal so I can take it to the instructor I want to ask to be my advisor, and then get started on formalizing the paperwork. If it's not possible, I may attempt it anyway, provided I can get a clear answer on the "how does it work" front. And the worst case scenario is that I won't do a translation MA, and will have to redirect my efforts and try to get a bit more interested in literature again.

I read the seminar description in more detail tonight, and if I get stuck in the worst case scenario, there are possible glimmers of hope in the part about what we can write about:
Friendship in 19th-Century British Literature
In the seminar, the emphasis falls on the literary realizations of the theme of friendship in 19th-century British fiction. However, the modernist and contemporary realizations of the theme of friendship will also be considered. Thus, with the theoretical basis in cultural studies, the students’ theses can also be written with the focus on contemporary popular fiction as exemplified by the works of Tom Holland (retreat into coteries, secret societies in contemporary gothic: The Vampire, Deliver us from Evil, Supping with Panthers).

Theoretical references: In the seminar the discourse of friendship it is approached (1) from the critical perspective of cultural materialism and New historicism, as a cultural, historical and political construct, and (2) from the philosophical perspective, as an important concept in ethics. Thus, it is viewed as a concept evolving in the debate conducted within the sphere of philosophical ethics beginning from the classical ideals of friendship (Plato’s, Aristotle’s, Cicero’s) , to medieval Christian (St. Aquinas), to Montaigne, to Kant’s taxonomy, finally, to contemporary consideration of friendship in the works of Gadamer, Derrida, and Agamben. However, there will also be considered works of the philosophers who do not discuss friendship as such, but rather human relationships within a broader ethical perspective of responsibility (Levinas) and solidarity (Rorty). The philosophical questions concerning friendship will include the problems of taxonomy of friendship and other relationships (C. S. Lewis, Aristotle, Kant), and the issue such as, for example, utilitarian and ideal friendship, disclosure in friendship, ending friendship, another self-in friendship, moral limits to friendship, self-sufficiency, celebrating sameness and difference, self-love, self- delusion, pride, vainglory and justice in friendship.
So, you know, if contemporary popular fiction is allowed, maybe I can do something with that.

*cries* I should have known something like this would happen. I got my hopes up, I got too far ahead of myself, and now I'm paying for it. But I'm not going to let the last three years go to waste, goddammit. I will not let this get to me. I WILL NOT LET THIS BREAK ME.

And if it doesn't work out my way, maybe I'll just set the building on fire.
astro_noms: (improving morale)

I'm pretty sure that whoever it was that came up with the idea of scented tissues will burn in the deepest fiery pits of hell for eternity. Or at least that they should. Because seriously, those things are the devil. And really, what's the point? If I'm using them to blow my nose because I'm sick, I'm not going to smell them anyway. And if I'm using them to blow my nose because I'm having an allergic reaction, the last thing I'll want to shove in my face is a tissue with a gross chemical smell.


I can understand lotion and aloe and whatever tissues. In fact, I absolutely love them; they've saved my nose from being dry and cracked on the outside and irritated and soggy on the inside many times. But why do we need the smell? (This also applies to other things, including feminine hygiene products and seriously, why would you do that?)


I never used to have allergies, but it seems like my body's decided that this allergy season is the absolutely perfect time to start experimenting with weird reactions to various things flying around in the air. I don't get the stereotypical allergic reaction, with the sneezing and runny nose, but I get upgraded to Sinuses Status: ANGRY BEES on a regular basis, and get to enjoy the accompanying headache and drowsiness, along with feeling like I want to shove a fine-tipped crochet hook up there and yank everything out.


And now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go blow my nose on my scented tissues because clearly I should learn to look more closely at the multi-packs when I grab them in the throes of the plague and/or allergies. :(


Mirrored from Tangents and Digressions.

astro_noms: (omg what is this)
So I found out today that in the MA program at our school, your thesis topic is largely dependent on a) the instructors running the seminars, and b) the topics of the seminars themselves. So, like, if the literature seminar topics are A, B, and C, run by instructors who specialize in, say, A, B, and X with a smattering of C, your thesis on F with a side of Z? probably not going to fly. Which means that there's probably going to be multiple theses on very similar topics.

We had a conversation about this with a few people, and all of us were completely boggled by this restriction. You'd think an academic institution would encourage its students to produce new work, rather than restricting their output. I realize it's difficult to have someone specializing in thing A being a thesis advisor on thing Y, especially if it's something super remote from their area, but I really hope there's some flexibility in this.
astro_noms: (i'm allergic to it actually)
Originally posted by [livejournal.com profile] elizardbits at FYI
For the people on my flist who do arty crafty things:

Hobby Lobby has decided that their oppressive religious beliefs trump federal mandate, and are refusing to pay for their employee's health care because it includes coverage for emergency contraception. They feel so strongly about denying this care to their female employees that they are willing to pay fines up to 1.3 million fucking dollars PER DAY.

That is how much Hobby Lobby hates and loathes and despises women. They hate women so much that losing 1.3 million dollars a day is worth it to them so long as they get to punish women that they think are godless sluts.

Please give your arty crafty money to literally anyone else on earth.



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